Morning After Pill is a blessing from God in the form of a tiny little capsule. It’s the horny bachelor’s final salvation, and the preferred method of contraceptive in general for most men. The Morning After Pill is a hormone based contraceptive pill that a woman has to ingest within 72 hours of sexual intercourse in order to prevent pregnancy if they happened to have sex without a condom. As long as they take the pill, there is no possible way she can get pregnant. The pill flushes out her entire system, and kills anything that might have possibly taken a hold. If you’re anything like me, right now you’ll be wondering why the hell every woman in the world doesn’t just take morning after pills each time they have sex?
Usually, the morning after pill is something you have to pick up at the pharmacy or drug store over the counter, so unfortunately it’s not something you can just stock up on at home. In fact, I have no idea why the morning after pill isn’t the norm right now for contraceptive. Seriously, if a man could fuck his girlfriend or wife every night without using a ball strangling piece of latex for a cum catcher, he’d GLADLY swallow a tiny little pill each morning when he woke up. Pharmacists all over the country would agree. Why force these dumb, horny, hungover teenagers to frantically rush into the store every Saturday morning with a mitful of cash and an embarrassed, terrified look on their face as they whisper quietly that they’d like the morning after pill. Why put them through that? I’m arguing this on the part of the woman too, trust me.
I worked in a pharmacy for a few years in high school, so I’ve seen it all a million times. Some beautiful, intelligent looking girl with her entire future ahead of her, stumbles in with a splitting headache and some dumb, meathead, asshole douche bag stumbling in behind her asking her to buy him some smokes. Wouldn’t it just be easier if the woman could just wake up in the morning, and take a tiny little pill? Just to make sure that this Neanderthal of a one-night stand doesn’t accidentally manage to infect her uterus with his poisonous seed? Imagine, all you have to do it take a tiny little pill every morning. Oh wait, that’s right! You already DO take a tiny little pill each morning. So, wouldn’t it be better if you only had to take that pill when you actually had sex? I have a close friend who got her heart broken, and she stopped having sex for two full years straight! Yet, for some fucked up reason, she still took a pill every morning.
Of course, it is important to mention that all your one night stands would still give you syphilis, gonorrhea, herpes, and potentially AIDS, but that’s not really relevant.
1. Fuck, last night I got so drunk I actually took Leanne home, and I didn’t wear a condom! Needless to say, I dragged her kicking and screaming down to the pharmacy first thing for the Morning After Pill.
2. If you’re reasonably sure that a girl doesn’t have a disease, try and convince her that you’re allergic to condoms. Then, when you wake up, buy her the Morning After Pill with her coffee.
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