Not to be confused with a giant, oversized jeep driven by dentists and plastic surgeons who have absolutely no godforsaken reason to drive such a large vehicle, the term Hummer actually refers to a type of oral sex. When someone gives you a hummer, he or she will wrap their mouth around your cock and hum as they give you a blowjob, creating sound vibrations that increase sexual stimulation and drive a guy crazy. It is rare that someone driving a hummer (the vehicle) would actually receive a hummer (blowjob), simply because anyone in a vehicle that hideously large probably has an extremely small penis.
Although this is a very specific type of blowjob, hummer can also be used synonymously with any type of cock sucking or deep throating. Often when a man receives a hummer, it is implied that it is a completely selfish act, where the man receives sexual gratification and the woman or male partner simply performs his/her duties without reciprocation. Hence, the most common locations and scenarios for hummers include movie theaters, bathroom stalls in bars, while driving a car, in the copy room at the office, in a tent while camping with friends, or any other scenario where a man gets his rocks off from an impressionable young slut who is eager to please.
Hummers are a fairly recent phenomenon in the oral sex world, and they have lots of variations and added techniques to improve sexual pleasure. For example, while an individual is performing a hummer, they can also stuff the cock in the side of their cheek like a wad of chewing tobacco, and repeatedly slap their own face like a drum. This variation is referred to as a “humdinger” and can significantly increase the speed of ejaculation. Also, it looks super slutty and hot, which also increases the speed of ejaculation.
Another, more advanced type of hummer used by college sluts around the world, is called the “humming bird.” While performing oral sex, the man or woman will clutch the man’s balls with one hand and gently rub his Choad with her fingertips as she hums on his cock. The result is pretty much an instant orgasm, where the man will ejaculate all over the person’s face. The person receiving this type of quick fix cumshot facial is then known to have been “hummmbled.”
Humming during oral sex is an excellent strategy for young girls with sensitive gag reflexes. If you are unable to deep throat, then humming or any of the above techniques are a viable option to please your man. This is a commonly used strategy by fat girls, Christian schoolgirls, girls with hair-lips, bad teeth, and general ugliness. It’s a surefire way to at least get a drunken booty call at 4:00am by one of the less popular boys at school, or at the very least from a cokehead line backer on the football team.
1. On the national holiday known as “Steak and Blowjob Day,” Clara gave Bobby a hummer outside on the back deck.
2. Uncle Herb got a hummer while he was driving the babysitter home last night.
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