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Friend With Benefits


A Friend With Benefits is a friend that you can have no-strings-attached sex with. They are also known as a fuck buddy, and they are one of the most beautiful relationships in the world. Friends With Benefits are different than a booty call, which is a person you can have no-strings-attached sex with, but who is not your friend. Just a random hottie that likes making fuck with you. Those are also fantastic relationships.

Basically, any person willing to fuck you without forcing you to be in a bullshit, ultimately doomed relationship is a good thing. If you find them, cherish them. Friends with benefits are a relatively new sexual dynamic, and proof that our species is evolving. It’s a slow evolution since we still have poverty and religion, but it is evolution nonetheless.

Yeah. I just got political, mafa. Too real for ya?

A friend with benefits can get tricky if one of the parties involved begins to have relationship feelings for the other person. Suddenly, instead of a lighthearted sex romp, you’re dealing with someone’s feelings for you. If this happens, immediately fuck them one last time, and then go back to just being friends until their relationship feelings subside. If they never subside, so be it. At least you got that one last fuck in.

Don’t tell them it’s the last fuck until they smarten up. It’ll be your little secret. During the last fuck, get really, really, really nasty. It’s like when you know you’re going to dump a girl. Make the last fuck something to remember. Of course, the easiest way to remember it is by secretly videotaping it, and watching it once you’ve broken it off.

But that would be wrong ;)

1. Karl was tired of monogamous relationships after his tenth failed long-term girlfriend. It always ended up the same way. The sex got boring. They grew apart. They began to be bored by one another. Her ass got fat. She began to nag him about bullshit. He could tell she was thinking about other guys while he fucked her, and he was thinking about other women. Conversations got strained. He decided to stay single and only have a series of short term flings. Along the way, his hot friend Jennifer told him that if he wanted her to be his Friend With Benefits, that she had always fantasized about fucking him. Now he is a very happy man. With all his new free time, he’s building a better world for all of us.

2. If you liked the show “Friends”, imagine how much you’d have liked it if it was called “Friend With Benefits”. Joey goes over and has a hot threesome with Rachel and Monica, and then goes back home to sleep. Meanwhile, Chandler and Phoebe get together to watch a movie, give each other oral sex in a sixty-nine until they both cum, and then Phoebe heads home. Ratings would skyrocket.

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