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A floozie is an easy woman, a ‘slut’, a sexually promiscuous woman, a woman who will give sex to someone at the drop of a hat. Floozie always sounds somewhat romantic and sexy. I picture a sultry woman with a slinky black dress and black heels and red fishnets, perhaps wearing a fascinator with a birdcage veil. Someone who is lying along a Grande piano or sitting on a bar stool drinking a belini and watching the crowd, ready to pick out her next conquest.
I’ve always wanted to be a floozie. My high school bestie and I use to dream about the days when we would seduce all the people we were attracted to and make passionate love to them with our hot sexuality. One night we were at this weird dance for international students that a friend of ours invited us to. We danced all night long to cheesy pop and dance songs, including The Macarena. We were only fifteen but we felt this sexual energy within us and we thought we were such hot shit, moving and grinding our bodies on the dance floor, in a darkened room with disco lighting. The song ‘Shy Guy’ came on and we found ourselves pairing off with these two men from Libya (who would later and forever be known as the Libyans) who were at least ten years older than both of us and who seemed unable to believe their good luck (which is exactly how we wanted them to feel). When the song ended and ‘Be My Lover’ came on, my friend and I went crazy with our Libyan Lovers, dancing and grinding and moving our bodies with theirs. And of course, the way little girls who are on the verge of discovering their own sexuality and sexual power are, we dashed out of the room the second the song ended and ran into the bathroom, short of breath and giggling like mad. That moment, that sexually charged four-minute experience kept us filled with passion for years after. Which is a good thing, since neither of us lost our virginities until after high school.
I wanted to be a floozie because I wanted to work my sexual power. I wanted to feel the intensity of my own sexuality. I’ve never thought that having sex with multiple partners was a bad thing. I was always kind of jealous of those of my friends who have more of a right to call themselves sluts, or who got to go through their ‘slutty phase’. I suppose we always want to experience everything that life has to offer us.
1. You’re such a floozie. Like, that’s totally meant as a compliment.
2. I wish I had spent less time agonizing about sex and more time getting it. I should’ve been sluttier when I had the chance. Now I’m in my eighties and I don’t know how to get the action I want. I suppose I just need to learn how to be the nursing home floozie.
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