The Treasure Trail is the fine line from the top of the clitoral hood to the belly button. It may or not be a line of hair. Especially common in pregnant women and black women. Dudes also have a treasure trail that goes from their chest to their pubes. But we’ll talk about the women first.
Women that have hair that grows from their belly button down to their clit are rare. Thank God. I think women should have as little hair as possible, below the eyebrows. I like licking a woman’s abdomen, so if there was a bunch of hair there, it would lessen my enjoyment. And it’s all about me. Ladies, wax that shit if you’ve got it.
Pregnant women often get a treasure trail that isn’t made of hair called a Linea Nigra. It’s the dark vertical line that appears on a woman’s abdomen for about seventy-five percent of women. It’s a brownish streak that is usually about a centimeter in width. It is caused by increased estrogen which also makes a woman’s nipples darken. It usually fades on a woman after the baby is born, taking around a year or so to disappear completely. This treasure trail is much more acceptable than a line of hair. Although, if you’re fucking a pregnant woman, you’ll probably spend most of your time working on her giant, milk-filled tits. So who cares about the abdomen?
For men, the treasure trail is natural and actually turns women on. For some men (like Italians and Greeks especially), the treasure trail starts at their uni-brow. For other men (like Scandinavians and Justin Beiber), the treasure trail starts below the belly button and is a thin line of hair that goes to the pubes. Well, not in Justin Beiber’s case, since he’s still waiting for his pubes to come in.
For blind women, the treasure trail is a helpful guide that can lead their hands, mouth, or pussy from a man’s chest to his penis. That’s why it is also known as the “happy trail”, the “treasure map”, and the “dinner line”. I’ve always thought he best nickname for the treasure trail is the “gut goatee”.
Personally I call my treasure trail “Fonté”. Why? Because it’s my Hairy Belly Fonté. For you kids out there who don’t get the joke, it’s a play on the singer Harry Belafonte’s name. If you don’t know who Harry Belafonte is, check out him singing “Banana Boat Song” with the Muppets. Classic. Tally me banana, buddy!
Sometimes the “treasure” at the end of the trail isn’t that great. Like when you follow a woman’s treasure trail down and her pussy is all beat up and smells bad. You feel like Geraldo Rivera opening Al Capone’s vault and finding a couple pop bottles.
1. Charlize Theron’s treasure trail is made of spun gold.
2. There are birds living in Wilfred Brimley’s treasure trail.
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