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Blue Balls


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The sensation of bruised or sore testicles a man experiences after having an erection for an extended period of time without having an orgasm. There has long been a suggestion that blue balls are an urban legend cooked up by horny teenage boys to coerce teenage girls into sex, but I can tell you, after coming home from a six hour bus trip in my last year of high school with Nicole Millman sitting on my lap the whole way, blue balls are very real and very painful. And by the way, I totally tapped that when we got back to her place. Hell ya. Thanks for asking.

1. Sitting next to Crystal in Advanced BioChem gave Chester a massive erection. Now he’s got blue balls so bad he can barely walk.

2. If blue balls are painful, Smurfs must be in agony.

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