The ‘Glans’ is the tip of the penis. You know, that salty mushroom-shaped bulbous head that is either fully exposed when your dick is circumcised or hidden by foreskin if your dick is uncircumcised. It nurses that tiny pinprick hole just big enough for jizz to shoot out. The glans are pretty obvious with a circumcised penis. If your dick isn’t circumcised, you have to slide back the foreskin to reveal the glans of your junk. Pretty simple. You do that all the time when you’re jerking off, right?
So what more can one really say about Glans? Plenty.
Glans are the sweet spot for both men and women. On a woman, the glans are considered the tip of the clitoris. For men and women, the glans are also where a gathering of nerve endings are meet, all in place for your sexual pleasure. The clitoris rocks when it comes to nerve endings. There are something like 8000 nerve endings in the clitoris and only half as many in the penis.
Glans are also known as any small rounded body or gland-like mass. Sounds like a boil, or something you scrape out of the drain. Gross. The truth is, glans are sensitive little bits of tissue that we would seriously miss if we didn’t have them. That mushroom cap on your dick is there for a reason. The little pea of your clitoris sending lightening bolts through your body is probably the only thing in your life that makes it worth living. Kind of like Kevin Spacey’s character Lester Burnham, a depressed suburban father in the middle of a mid-life crisis, said in the movie American Beauty when he’s jerking off in the shower, ‘this is the high point of my day’. Of course, then he meets his daughter’s hot blonde friend (played by Mena Suvari) and starts jerking off everywhere while picturing her in a bathtub filled with rose petals, telling him how dirty she is, that she needs him to give her a bath. Right. That’s going to happen. The high point of anyone’s day, really, is to rub one out and the only way to get any true satisfaction out of that is to work the glans. Think about Mena Suvari if you need to. She doesn’t mind being in your creepy fantasies.
1. Joey gripped his dick in his hand. He slid back his foreskin and examined the glans. It seemed swollen. Maybe he really did need to see a doctor. He watched a movie once where this dude had a weird swollen part on his dick. He didn’t do anything about it and the swollen part grew into a tumour and suddenly he had a lump the size of a golf ball on his dick. The guy’s friends noticed in the locker room and started teasing him, saying he was three balls short of being walked. Joey shuddered. How was he going to get to a doctor without telling his mom?
2. Glans sounds like glands, right? They’re not the same thing. But they’re close.
RELATED TERMS: