If Saint Patrick were alive today he’d be sitting in his South Boston apartment slamming back a Sam Addams and listening to Dropkick Murphys. When he’s done his beer, he’d call his fuck buddy Carmen McKenna. Carmen is a gorgeous redhead he met down by the docks. She looks like Kylie Ireland and her claim to fame is that once she blew a guy who bought a bedazzled jean jacket from Big Papi Ortiz’s wife. Saint Patrick loves redheads and after the jump you will too.
Posts Tagged ‘porno’
Fuck A Redhead For St. Paddy’s Day
Friday, March 16th, 2012
Porn Star of the Week – Ava Rose
Monday, February 27th, 2012Alaska is cold. I’ve never been but once I jerked it to a Saturday Night Live skit where Tina Fey played Sarah Palin so I must be an expert on the state. Besides the Palinator, (which should be the name of a sex toy shaped like Russia – remember that whole nonsense about how she thought she could see Russia from her backyard? What a tool!) Alaska is the birth place of a very sexy porn star. Ladies and gentlemen, Orgasm.com brings you Ava Rose!
Beer Googles + Drunk Sex = Bad News
Friday, February 24th, 2012The worst thing happened. I went out with my buddies. Fine. Great. We go out all the time. However, this time it was for a bachelor party. My friend Dumb-fry (his last name is Dumfries, naturally we had to give him a nickname) finally found some chick who could tolerate his addiction to Star Trek The Next Generation and the Indianapolis Colts. He proposed. She said yes. Now it’s ten months later and Dumb-fry is about to tie the knot. Cut to last night. There was beer. There was a celebrity. There was champagne. There were strippers. And then there was me waking up this morning with a bucket of yuck in my bed. Damn you beer goggles!
Be A Cunning Linguist of Cunnilingus
Thursday, February 2nd, 2012When I was younger I thought I was really good at going down on girls. Why? Because I had one girlfriend tell me I was good at it. When you’re a freshman in college and your lady tells you that what you’re doing to her downstairs is making her cum like in all those grainy porno clips you used to download with dial up, you might consider yourself the pussy eating king. It turns out I wasn’t. I wasn’t even the pussy eating prince. I was just a guy who thought he was doing it right because one chick told him he was. It wasn’t until three girlfriends later that I learnt how to properly perform cunnilingus. Get ready to get schooled in the art of licking cunt because if you used to be like me in my freshman year of college, you need all the pointers you can get. After the jump things are about to get wet.
Adult Choices
Wednesday, September 14th, 2011
When we are growing up, all we wanted to do was to rush home from school to watch the cartoons that were on television then. When we got a little older, we rushed home to watch some soap operas or maybe the afternoon movie. Later on, we began to become interested in dance shows, sporting events, or some of the prime time action adventure selections. When we were finally so called adults, we liked to watch the news shows, a good movie, or of course a sporting event. Well, when we finally became adults, most of us also liked to watch a good porno movie or stag film as they used to be called. Unfortunately finding a porno movie or a stag film like this one with Jenna Brooks was not all that easy. We used to have to go to an Adult video store by the side of a deserted road, order something on line, or bite the bullet and go into a video rental store and risk running into someone we knew at the cash register as we were checking out our selection.
Well today things are a lot easier for us as far as access to many different adult entertainment options go. The Internet has more choices for us than we could possibly ever imagine or hope to make use of, and there is no waiting, no uncomfortable chit chat with a check out person, no scratches, bumps or pops in the films, and best of all no judgement whatsoever from any source at all. We can enjoy some adult entertainment at any time that we choose, and we can enjoy it with the childlike wonder of a kid watching the cartoons that they know will be there for them every day after school and every Saturday morning without fail.
Yes, you are all sorts of grown up now, but you can still always have some fun if you would like to.
Sex And Promises and Video Tape
Thursday, May 26th, 2011We live in the technologically advanced age of air brushing, re-touching, re-shooting, re-adjusting and of course special effects. It is no wonder then, that some of our most popular Free sex videos to be found on the Internet are of the slick, professional looking variety.
Gone are the days of the raw and grainy porno movies that used to be viewed with a cumbersome projector in dingy, low ceilinged, panelled basements all across America. Today’s sex videos are well executed and evolved, and most have a very professional look and feel to them.
In the porn and sex industries, many producers of XXX movies have formed large corporations which encompass many different websites of many different kinky varieties. There is something to be found by every pervert seeking entertainment in 2011, and there is no need to scuttle off to a friends basement hoping that the latest reel to reel film will at least have a few somewhat attractive naked people rolling around in it. Today it is easy to find one or two websites that act as a sort of umbrella for so many related sites that those one or two may be all that you need to use as a springboard for your viewing choices. Or it may be that the one or two will become your favorites, and sometimes you will venture out to see what else you can come across out there in the world of cyber sex.
However you choose to manage your sex video experience, you will find more than enough superior quality material to keep you happy, horny and interested. Many of the stars in these flicks look just about perfect thanks to plastic surgery, good lighting, careful editing and the actors best friend, the old re-touch.
But, hey, if you want to keep it real, you can always just veer off to one of the amateur sites for a bit of variety.
Take It In The Rear
Monday, February 28th, 2011For some straight men, there is a big stigma against having their ass played with in any way. Fingering, and certainly no sex toys are allowed in there! Too bad for them that they are missing out on a wonderful life pleasure. There is hope, however, for the hopelessly straight man who is at least willing to try to allow his girlfriend to explore beyond the penis. And if he thinks it is too weird, just boot up some porn that will show him how awesome it can be!
One of the best ways for a woman to first approach stimulating a guy’s asshole is to begin while there is other intense pleasure happening for him. She might take his succulent cock head into her mouth. While she is sucking him, she might take the personal lubricant from the nightstand and begin to rub some gently around the outside of his anus. Make sure he is still distracted by the free porn at this point.
She can keep sucking, and while he is in the throes of pleasure, insert one finger slowly. No need to pound hard or do too much at all. He might be taken aback at first, but he is also likely to flow with how good that finger feels inside him while he is getting a blow job. Once he gets acclimated, she can move her finger gently to discover the best subtle motions that will stimulate his prostate (P-spot).
If he has never had an anal experience, he might thank her later.
A not-too- big vibrator might be another way to begin for the more adventurous man. Quite a number of guys are curious about what it must feel like to get fucked with a vibrator because they see porno clips of women loving it, or their girlfriends hitting their orgasm with the sensation. Stroking his cock and balls while introducing the lubed-up vibrator to his ass would be a good way to go. It is generally fun to insert it while it is off then turn on the vibrations and watch him jump with startled ecstasy.
Butt plugs and anal beads: These might be best for once he is familiar with the backdoor route. Often, inserting the number of anal beads you like inside you by yourself is a good thing to do, followed by sexual activity with the partner. Once a guy discovers these pleasures, he may fuck himself silly with a butt plug while his cock is inside his favorite pussy.
Targeting Premature Ejaculation
Wednesday, January 19th, 2011Whether you can’t even bring yourself to finish your favorite porno or your known as a one-minute-man, premature ejaculation can be a real pain in the ass. While Viagra can help you prolong your erection, it wont necessarily help when anticipated orgasms are concerned. As an attempt to extend your performance in the bedroom, read on for a list of tips on how to last longer and leave your partner smiling and satisfied.
1. Acknowledge The Problem – One of the first steps in dealing with premature ejaculation is acknowledging the problem in the first place. In 2009, a medical conference in Paris defined premature ejaculation as the result of men who can’t last more than one to three minutes of sex before climaxing. This parameter was defined due to pressure from the pharmaceutical industry, which required an objective criteria in order to come out with medication targeting the problem at hand. As for the medical criteria, it is far less specific. Most doctors claim that anyone who can’t bring themselves to last as long as they’d want to is already suffering from premature ejaculation, so take that for all its worth.
2. The Usual Suspects – Despite doctors not having a concrete explanation for what causes premature ejaculation, studies lead them to believe that it has something to do with a man’s genetic build. Research indicates that the center of an orgasm, located in the brain, is far more sensitive in those suffering from premature ejaculation – making them ‘be over and done with’ a lot faster. But despite some men showing signs of a “sensitive spot” on the brain, that doesn’t necessarily mean they won’t be able to last longer than their effected counterparts.
3. A Means Of Defense – Most men will tell you that at some point or another, try as they might, they can’t get a woman to orgasm. When that happens, they might be inclined to simply bring themselves to cum and call it a day. As a result, the woman will complain and think that her partner is not giving it his all. The next time around, the same thing is bound to happen. Women will blame men for their own lack of orgasm and if they’re already predispositioned to premature ejaculation, this is bound to further enhance his problem. So remember, before turning to a doctor, consider the possibility that your sex partner could have something to do with it.
Sex Courses For Elderly Couples: Bringing Back The Joy of Sex
Tuesday, November 30th, 2010
A state in Northern Malaysia is providing sex education for elderly couples in an attempt try to lower rising divorce rates. This isn’t the first attempt by the Malaysian government; they have also implemented newlywed sex courses and free honeymoons for couples in crisis.
For a country that’s hitting the third world mark you would think they would want to spend their money on more important things and just throw some free porn in front of the couples in hopes that would help them, but then again, that’s just my theory and what do I know?
I guess this weekend long seminar for elderly couples aims at “bringing back the joy in sex” and shows long time married couples how to get their partner’s libido going again.
It is totally rare for a Muslim majority country to be so open when it comes to sexual health but come on people, we’re talking about elderly couples here, not newlyweds! Do they really need to spend money on trying to get them back in the sack with each other? It’s not like they’re going to be making babies. The only thing they’re going to be making is bad visions in the minds of those who read this article and then picture two elderly Malaysians having nasty sex.
I guess for a country where three out of every 10 marriages are ending in divorce, officials are just trying to keep couples and families together by making courses available that are aimed at retaining intimacy.
Last year, the country organized a sexual relations course for newly married couples and encouraged them to bathe together and use exotic fragrances to “arouse sexual desire”. They have also asked local cosmetic firms to introduce specific perfumes that are targeted for couples because a lot of the couples that were divorcing said it was not only because of a lack of sex, but because of their partners bad body odor!
This whole initiative seems like something that you would watch in a movie, or even a really bad porno. But, it’s all real! I wonder if the American government would hop on this band wagon…
Happy Birthday Porn Stars!
Wednesday, April 21st, 2010It’s that time again (which generally translates into ‘whenever i have nothing else to write about’) to give a shout out to some celebrity porno birthdays worth celebrating this month.