Archive for March, 2011

The Sex Video

Thursday, March 31st, 2011

The obligatory sex video once held the casual pornography viewer as well as the ardent connoisseur in an iron-fist grip of aching need; where to buy it, affording the tape, where to watch it even, were all deep concerns. These days a naughty video is viewed more as a collector’s item, obsolete really in the way we view dirty images, certainly an old paradigm of the way we buy and view or porn. People are not halting their viewing of men and women getting it on, have no less an interest in cum shots, oral sex and all manner of nasty activities and fetishes, it is just nowadays we can get all this stuff easier than renting a tape.

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As we grew from 8-millimeter to triple x movie fare, to home video to straight-to-video features, so now do we view what we view across our PC screens in the privacy of our own homes. As all other businesses progress in some way or die on the vine, digital technology made the selling, distributing and production of the modern day porn films a wholly different business then it was even five years ago, let alone from way back in the day when stag films were produced for bachelor party viewing. Pornographers today realize that current technology renders old idea obsolete, that the time is well passed to ruminate over the changes in the business, that even when one idea is being tried another, better, faster and newer one is being considered. In all business this quicker-than-you-can-think-it mentality exists but never stronger than in the world of providing visual stimuli for masturbation. Technology is both a blessing-for those who wish to assimilate and dissect these images at and ever faster cheaper rate-or a curse-for those trying to sell their porn downloads to an audience who can get all that sucking and fucking for free if they wish to.

The scenarios, images and ideas of the classic fuck show will never go out of style. As a culture we like our naughty images and will forever search for them from various sources. It is not a question of what do about the production of dirty movies as much as how to produce and distribute a good sex film and how to create something ever newer that people will be willing to pay for.

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You Will Not Score With A Stripper

Thursday, March 31st, 2011

Hetero guys can coddle many a fantasy. When it comes to what makes their dicks rise they will believe a whole cornucopia of possibilities, the least of which is that a woman who is waiting on them, is in fact interested in them beyond the porn service she is providing. Tipping a waitress is all a waitress is really interested in her customers for, even if she is vigilant about doing a good job. And strippers, who see the very worst of men and their objectification, know best of all how to work a smile or a shaking ass to attract men to them, or make men feel they are attracted to them.

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The concept of girls working for the tip is not lost on the men who tip them yet men still proceed as if the women could possibly be interested in them. The fantasy is enough to keep men coming back time and again and for women to work within the fantasy. There is always a hope that a guy and girl are making a connection-at least the hope exists from the man’s point of view-but for the most part a stripper stays far away from her audience. There is almost an unwritten code of ethics in this situation, ironic as that might seem.

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It might be a little bit of the thrill of the chase. It might be the idea of the sexuality a stripper portrays, akin to wanting to sleep with a porn star that creates the allure. And it might also be the simple fact that most strippers need to be attractive to be able to do their job well. The full package; the slightly aloof woman showing only a small amount of her tits and ass to a seething group of men aching to jump her bones might be cliché but it fuels the very best sexual scenario and one even the most asexual of us would be hard pressed to ignore.

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As long as there exists the interplay between men and women, whether on line across cams, over the phone with PSO’s or live and in person with strippers, women will always hold the upper hand in the interaction and men will allow it as long as they can coddle the ideal of scoring with the woman they are paying to pay attention to them.

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Is Real-life Play Better?

Wednesday, March 30th, 2011

Beyond the obvious physical sensation of feeling another person touch our skin, investing time, energy and maybe even some band-aids into a real-life kink scene, the question of, is real life play better then on-line, isn’t so easily answered.

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First, there are the disadvantages to weigh. The minute we let another person into our sexual world, even briefly and even with specific rules and regulations, we welcome the thin veneer lifted from our fantasy and the possibility of how we think we want things to go and how they actually do proceed while another person acts through our kink with us. Sometimes the unknown works in our favor, another person’s style can add unimagined richness to a scene – …just their speech and temper can invest a meeting with nuances we have heretofore never imagined. But there are also the needs of our partner to consider and since so much of a fetish is in one’s head, so much of a what a kinky person has envisioned has been in the pristine environs of one’s imagined world, where everything happens like clockwork. Seldom do we really think about another person’s need when we are playing on line, but the second we let a play partner in, no matter how attractive they are or how adept they boast, the simple act of seeing their hopes, dreams, habits and quirks alive before us can become problematic.
Then there is the worry, as every dating couple finds, of one person coming to want the other more. The advantages of a real life play partner are many as well. Finally, one can engage kinks that need another person, not just masturbating to some fetish object or porn stash we keep hidden. For certain types of play another person is wholly necessary and better executed with a real life human being – it’s rather hard to spank oneself effectively! Hearing someone else’s reaction in real time, seeing someone’s body undulate or shifting ours to reasoned tickles, touches, swats or suggestion, coaxing an orgasm or feeling one forced from us, all because another person is standing in the room with us is quite a heady thing to people who might only ever play on-line.

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What one needs to determine is if the possible good will out weigh the possible bad – if the off-putting speech, smells and wants won’t completely put off the activities both people want to engage in, and if at the end of the day will both partners enjoy their scene better in person then on-line.

Rock Star Fantasies

Wednesday, March 30th, 2011

Some people use the word “starfucker” as if that would be a bad thing. You may or may not have had the opportunity to fuck your favorite rock star, but it isn’t surprising that for a great number of serious fans, entertaining fantasies of their favorite singers can enhance sexual experiences with partners. Women are by far the most intense when it comes to being star struck for a singer, but guys are not without their crushes on the rich and famous, too.

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Desires might run the gamut from wanting to be close to a sensitive artist with immense talent, or to just be a slut and blow a whole grunge rock band backstage. It could be something in between or all of the above. These kinds of porn fantasies lend themselves to good role-playing games. If the partner of a star-struck person is a good sport, many fun games can come about through this avenue. If you’’ve ever wanted to know what it would be like to be a good ol’’ bluesman seducing your beautiful woman, putting on some deep Delta sounds and fucking real slow might be in order! Your lover might get so caught up in the fantasy that your stiff cock will benefit from all of that pent-up energy she’’s been storing up for the sweet and sexy punk musician she has always thought about. If a gang bang is more yours or her scene, you could even invite some friends in, don some tough-boy British accents and you all can have an orgy with The Rolling Stones.

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Glam rockers are also very alluring, as are flannel-shirted grunge types, introspective and cross-gender gay rockers; they are all just as good to fantasize over as any prototypical Elvis or Fabian. The main thing for the fantasizing couple is to let the scene overtake you, use the music of the stars you are emulating and let yourselves go with the wildness of the era.
Couples need to let their imaginations run wild every now and again. Nearly everyone fantasizes, masturbates and can marry the two over a image, song or idea. Leave time for hot talk and space for your fanboy or girl to express what would make the setting perfect to experience lovemaking while the music of choice is on. Kick back and let go.

How to Hide a Kink

Tuesday, March 29th, 2011

There are just too many ways to get found out these days. The closer we get to a friend, the more we even try to hide from a family member, all those secrets we don’’t tell a sex partner, it’’s still too easy for our deepest, darkest secrets to be known.

Even people with so much to lose, but who have great money in which to insulate themselves, can leave a text message on their phone or an open email. Double-checking, protocols in place, separate accounts, the anonymous nature of the net – still, there is something we might forget to hide.

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For men and women courting a fetish they keep secret, the way is precarious at best. Not only are they engaging, or want to engage in something slightly unusual to the common person, but they are opening themselves up to scrutiny, derision and judgment from lovers if and when they reveal their ache for a spanking, or the desire to pee on a lover. This is why so many people simply hide their fetish.

But the manner in which one hides their kink can vary. For many, they simply only ever play on-line, engaging their desires over chat emails, watching free porn, or camming with like-minded kinksters. The Internet allows great freedom with its built-in anonymity.

For others who need to feel the sting of the lash across their flanks for real, or have an all consuming need to cross-dress in a room full of their peers, they search out the closed ranks of private play parties or well known safe play spaces. To keep one’’s fetish close to one’’s leather vest and not have to worry about the embarrassment of a kink being detected by some unsuspecting lover or family member, one must either stay within the confines of on-line social sites specific to a specific sexual desire or make sure the group one runs with have as much to lose by detection as they do.

Infidelity

Tuesday, March 29th, 2011

People in general, but especially husbands, have trouble believing that a woman would cheat on a good man, a loving husband. Truth is, unless men in their affairs are only going after single women or gay men,  they have to be cheating with someone. New studies claim that there is a widespread problem of female infidelity.

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The reasons women give for fucking around include having feelings that something is missing in their lives. They might have all the things that they wanted, including a stud muffin as a husband, but they feel they should be happier. This feeling that they should be happier usually leads to a loss of interest in sex. They go out of their way to avoid going to bed at the same time as their husbands. Fucking their husbands becomes a job that they don’’t like.

Now, any man looking to get his cock into the cunt of an unhappily married woman will find the timing right, because at the
same time the woman is feeling violated by her husband’’s sexual advances,  she is also reawakening her sexual desires for fresh meat. She longs to be seen as sexy and wants to feel that passion she had early on for her husband.

People that have affairs will feel sexier, happier, but for many women these feelings may cause guilt, pain, remorse and a need to justify their actions . Many women are taught to believe that good women do not stray. Only  porn “whores” sleep around. So they may justify their actions by thinking that they have found their soul mate in the person they are cheating with.

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After an affair women may be more verbal about what they want in and out of the bedroom. Sometimes the affair makes the marital bed better, but in most cases it has the woman looking for someone new to start over with.

Men who are cheated on and the women that cheat are usually left with emotional scars. There are many reasons for infidelity, such as boredom, the rush of a new partner, the desire for more sex, to fill an emotional void, or sexual addiction.

More Pleasure For All

Monday, March 28th, 2011

In Western culture, many are raised to believe that pleasure is bad, especially sexual pleasure. The belief is that good feelings and sexual exploration are sinful. In the modern world, this belief has started to change with the rise of sex positive culture, but perhaps a few words on why sex and pleasure are beneficial will help.

It’s obvious that sex is a natural part of the human experience, and everyone comes with a different set of fetishes and desires. If we don’t seek out a healthy sex life, it can be as damaging as trying to go without any of our other most basic needs, leading to depression or at least unhappiness. Who knows how many hide their fantasies –for BDSM, threesomes, sex toys, or anything vanilla or twisted – when they could easily find the object of their desires if they just tried, perhaps on an online dating site.

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The healthy reality is that sex has countless benefits. It releases endorphins, which give pleasure, cause feelings of euphoria, and even relieve pain. The effect of arousal on the mucous membranes of the body can relieve congestion. Many have heard the old phrase “I have a headache;” in actuality the effect of orgasms can relieve headaches. Some studies have even shown that recreational spanking can aid people with chronic pain conditions like arthritis.

Unlike many animals on earth, we use sex and sexual pleasure for procreation as well as social networking. Today’s hookups may be tomorrow’s business contact (or long term partner!). Who knows – stranger things have happened? Sex can bring friends closer together, and create new bonds in your social circle. Instead of worrying about whether you should sleep with sorts of exciting new possibilities for pleasure.

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While most hookups remain just hookups, other things can happen. A threesome can turn into a true triad, or a permanent master/slave relationship, arising from casual playtimes.

So what are you waiting for? Get out there and find someone to spank, kiss, or play out your porn fantasies with! Because dreams do come true.

Finding Our Fetish

Monday, March 28th, 2011

You don’t even have to know exactly what kink your might be interested in to find it , …or, at least, to find fellow kinky people to play with. It used to be that  it was much harder for a woman to find kinky partners; you used to have to walk in to some out of the way big city sex shop, or park out back of those suburban spots always fully lit and right on the edge of a major highway. Inside, if you could ever even hope to catch the eye of patrons who were very much like you, scared of being seen, keeping their heads buried in video tape titles or scanning magazines, maybe you’’d meet someone with your same interest. It was a one-in-a-million chance to find someone who’’d strike up a conversation, let alone someone you might be attracted to. If one was lucky, the most you might hope for was some new exciting masturbatory material, or maybe a few hastily bought fetish papers chuck-full of personal ads that were really only ever pro doms advertising.

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Occasionally one might hear of a club or some party and be happily dragged along in a group, but even then you’’d either find a space too dark and intimidating too feel comfortable standing in, let alone bending over a pommel horse for a good ass-warming.


These days, the net has opened up a wide world of possibilities for the fetish-minded guy or gal. Kinks galore meet us as we click, scan and surf across the web. Even straight Internet dating sites occasionally allow for certain boxes to be filled-out on their on-line profiles that will indicate to those naughty people in the know an alternate sexuality.  There are also social networking sites for kink amassing a cross-section of men and women, bi ,straight, gay and anything in between. There are parties announced regularly on email blast lists and the network of fetish spreads ever wider as more and more people become linked through playing live, emailing, or chatting.

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Kink, like porn, can now be found almost anywhere.

Hot-Blooded

Friday, March 25th, 2011

There are some men and women who seem to be the very epitome of the classic hot blooded lover. They seem overtly passionate about life, and certainly their sensual pursuits, and walk with a certain swagger, a sexual animus they seem to exude. Of course a good amount of the time what passes for sex style and cat-like sexuality is more anger or sometimes even deep psychosis, still there are those men and women among us who seem to be very hot blooded and ready to take on anyone who will engage their sexual prowess.

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Regardless if one person is sexier than another, anyone courting the player of a crowd may need to be on their guard with a well-seasoned lover. True, the hot blooded guy or girl knows their way around the bedposts and round back again, they can act like a real life porn star, but these are most likely people who have left more than a few broken hearts in their wake. One doesn’’t grow a sizable reputation with a chunk of sexual animus usually unmatched without using one’’s seductive power at least a few times!

But in most cases, even the sexually voracious, the lothario, and the seductress play more on their reputation than they do any real sexuality. True, there are those that exude more confidence than others, but somewhere along the line they had to have begun from one encounter, been a novice before they gained their rep and style, been not so hot blooded. The seemingly smokingly sexual hotties we encounter really are like anybody else; they have just traded on some empirical attractiveness, a good gift for gab and a growing list of conquests that get easier to conquer the more one conquers.

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Sexual attractiveness is like beauty, it is up to each beholder to determine for him or herself what turns them on. Swagger does go a long way and there are those people who seem to be able to turn on the charm and smoky sexuality more than others, but in the end, a great hot blooded lover must prove his or her fucking worth in bed.

Stocking Fetish

Friday, March 25th, 2011

A secret sexual ache for a thong, a corset, panties and all manner of whatever can show off and cover a woman’’s legs leads many fetishists to develop a stocking fetish.

Nothing says classy like a pair of thigh high stockings on a pair of legs that seem to go on forever. Paired with a thong and matching corset and a woman is sure to feel sexy and give off an amazing amount of sex appeal.

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Stockings come in all different types and flavors. They vary in color, coverage and design. Before the 1590s, stockings were made of woven cloth. The first knitting machines were for making stockings and the stockings themselves were made of cotton, linen wool or silk. In the 1920s, legs covered by stockings were revealed as the dress hemlines rose. These stockings were sheer, first made of silk or rayon (called artificial silk), and after 1940, with nylon. The first pantyhose made an appearance in the 1940s and 1950s, when film and theater productions had stockings sewn to the briefs of actresses and dancers.

Today stockings are commonly made using knitted wool, silk, cotton or nylon. The introduction of pantyhose in 1959 provided a convenient alternative to stockings, and the use of stockings declined dramatically. In 1970, U.S. sales of pantyhose exceeded stockings for the first time, and have remained this way ever since.

But among fetishists, stockings remain popular. The sheer look with leather and lace give an aesthetic many find desirable. This is why there is still so much stocking porn.

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Stockings are held up in one of three ways. With garter belts worn underneath panties (for easier removal of panties), or with stay-up technology, where  silicone bands around the tops are slip resistant. Lastly, plain garters such as the ones seen typically at weddings are used to hold up a woman’s hose. The drawbacks are evident but worth it for many. The first obvious drawback is the need to continue readjusting the belt.

Depending on the tone of a woman’s skin, she may choose to wear fishnet hose, the wider fencenet style or all opaque to give the illusion of mystery. Many prefer thigh highs to full blown pantyhose, though pantyhose offer a better solution during winter weather.

Care of stockings varies as well but most quality pairs are best hand washed in warm water and hang flat to let dry.