Posts Tagged ‘Sex’

Lady Libido Lulls

Tuesday, October 5th, 2010

So you love your guy and you think he is sexy, but you’re having a hard time getting up the gumption to fuck his brains out. Your low sex drive might be attributed to a drop in your testosterone levels. Yes, the commonly known “male hormone” is responsible for women’s sexual response as well as your friends with the outdoor plumbing, the men. Guys, this is a good time to pay attention and see if it’s worth checking in with your lady to see if this could be an issue for her.

Let’s also consider the glaringly obvious point that women and men are not the same sexually. More than that, we both have different sexual response cycles from one another, different genitalia and different turn-ons and turn-offs. Men get horny then want to have sex (after after watching free porn), a lot of women experience in reverse: begin to have sex and then get horny. Before you worry about a hormonal issue, you may want to try going along for a bit of the ride as it were, and see if it makes you horny. Failing that, or possibly even just for good measure, check in on your testosterone levels with your doctor. Women with low testosterone levels may experience low or no sex drive.

A doctor can recommend solutions for raising your libido. From foods you can eat to medication you can try. The most important thing to keep in mind is that there might be other reasons than just your mood that may be causing a drop in your sexual energy. Also remember that your sexual peak is around the age of 35, so you may have not reached your peak yet and may be feeling a lull, or you might be past it and on your way out of menstrual land. In either event, there are solutions. Make sure you let your boyfriend know that you still find him extremely fuckable and you can both work together to get your motor running again.

Pay Up: The Reality of Modern Prostitution

Monday, October 4th, 2010

Sex is a commodity. According to the old saying, it’s the oldest job in the world. So, why is it the only commodity we feel shame for paying for? Some of us feel personal humiliation for paying for sex, based on the assumption that if you’re handsome or smart enough that you wouldn’t have to pay for it. You can buy sex or you can work for it, but the idea that you shouldn’t have to do either is silly. Going to a sex worker is often regarded by clients as an “emotionally cleaner” transaction. You don’t have to put in any emotional energy. You go in, you get your needs met, you have your orgasm, you pay the lady, you go home. Simple.

Another reason for this shame, is that in most countries it is highly taboo and illegal. As George Carlin used to say “Selling is legal, fucking is legal. So why isn’t it legal to sell fucking?

Prostitution has been decriminalized in parts of Germany, all of Australia and New Zealand, Holland, as well as parts of Nevada. Unfortunately, however, in North America overall, any politician who would take this issue on would likely be committing career suicide. There is a perception that the oppressed and downtrodden prostitute won’t be protected, even though this is often made worse by prohibition.

People love black and white pronouncements and are uncomfortable with grey area. Most of us don’t want to look at whole situation. Sometimes paying for sex is okay, sometimes it’s not. Officially no one “ought” to be doing it, so we just sweep it all under the carpet. If we said this is okay, then the government would feel like they’ve lost control. People assume if commodities like drugs and sex were decriminalized, everyone would be fucked up all the time or using prostitutes all the time. This is not the case in governments that to allow (and therefore tax) sex work. There is significantly more control because more people are on the books and this is seen as a legal occupation. As a result, there is more protection for both the sex workers and the Johns. Why we’re at it, lets say porn stars too.

For now, it seems like if prostitutes want to be safe, they either have to lay low and find a good madam and/or quiet clients, or move to a place that is more accommodating to their choices. The downside to that is that the market will be more significantly penetrated, and supply and demand might run a little dry.

The Trip

Saturday, October 2nd, 2010

Ruthanne opened her eyes to a darkened bedroom, the clock on the nightstand reading 1:30. ”I’ve been out for eight hours?” she mumbled stumbling into the bathroom. It was only after she turned on the light and looked at herself in the mirror that she remembered that Jake was gone for the next five days.

Stripping off her sweats and T, the lanky brunette turned on the shower, stepped under the slightly stinging jets and let the needles sooth her. As the water splashed against her heavy breasts, she thought back to over a year ago, to the very first time Jake had touched her. This snap-shot of a moment was one Ruthanne masturbated to often, the first time she knew that Jake was the man for her. Jake had been so gentle, caressing and touching her so artfully with his obviously strong hands; where most men pulled and pawed at her big breasts, he had been almost tentative. She had fallen for Jake then and there and they were married within that year.

“Oh, Jake,” she sighed as she slid one hand down over her flat belly to just the top of her pubic bone, the other grabbing her big right breast. ”Oh, Jake,” she repeated into the hot water as she got up on tip toes, clutched her dewy tit, tickled her index finger down to her clit and…came.
Ten minutes later Ruthanne was dried, warm and curled up with a pillow between her thighs, dreaming of her husband.

A virgin on their wedding night, Ruthanne had become sexually alive this last six months of her new marriage. The orgasms her husband coaxed from her with his rather large cock, his fast tongue and those perfect big hands were addictive. She woke out of a fitful sex dream and feeling the heavy tension between her legs from the obvious humping of Jake’s pillow, the long-limbed lady lifted her left breast and took her nipple in her mouth. Sucking on herself, pressing her pelvis onto the tented pillow, Ruthanne came even before fully waking.

Knowing she’d just go on masturbating for five days, Ruthanne rolled over to the phone on her nightstand. ”Please give me the number for Mex-Air reservations,” she said.

The flight from Chicago to Mexico City was uneventful except for the fact the Ruthanne was literally squirming in her seat. When the Captain announced: “We will be landing in Mexico City in ten minutes, please fasten you seat belts.” Ruthanne did just that, the belt cutting erotically between her heaving bare breasts under this pretty floral dress she had worn just for Jake. De-boarding and a thirty-minute cab ride later, Ruthanne stood waiting impatiently at the front desk of the “El Condor” as the lone clerk finally looked up from this phone call.

“My husband is staying here, his name’s Jake Gannon. He’s with ‘Med-Sure’” Ruthanne said. The clerk punched a few buttons on the computer. ”Room 1154, take those elevators to the eleventh floor and turn right.”

Nodding thanks, the tall woman sprinted for the elevator. Feeling that squishiness between her legs she rode the elevator alone then took five steps down the hallway to stand in front of room 1154. Knocking softly, settling her breath, smoothing her hands down her slinky dress, after what seemed to be an eternity-but was not more then 30 seconds-the door swung open. Jake’s secretary, Claire stood in the doorway.

“W-what are you doing here?” Ruthanne stammered to the stunned Chinese girl.

“We were just going over tomorrow’s itinerary,” the little woman said. An instinctive jealousy grew in Ruthanne’s gut as she barged in past Claire, but her rising anger was just as quickly quelled when she walked into the scene of Jake and several Mexican gentlemen seated at a table littered with papers. Jake turned his head, and with his mouth hanging open almost shouted: “Ruthie, wha…what are you doing here!?!”

“I-I just wanted to surprise you…I shouldn’t have. I’m sorry, I’m sorry.”

Jake leaped to his feet and put his arms around his shaken retreating spouse. Turning back to his guests he said: “Can we take this up tomorrow!?!” The room quickly emptied as the men nodded to Ruthanne and Claire smiled and said goodbye. Tears poured from Ruthanne’s eyes the second the room was empty.

“I’m sorry you felt compelled to come all this way,” Jake said taking his wife in his arms. ”It’s all my fault,” Ruthanne replied in the crux of his elbow. “It’s just that I missed you and it’s the first time we’ve ever been apart and I just couldn’t take being alone, and…” Jake pulled his wife from his hug, smiled down to her and said: ”Let me get you a drink.”

“No,” Ruthanne said, took a step back and wiggled down her dress.

“Ruthanne!” Jake said to his completely naked wife.

“I was going crazy on the plane, wondering if somebody could tell I was naked underneath…which of course made me even crazier.”

“You are so naughty.”

“Naughty for you,” she said stepping out of the splash of material at her heels.

“No, no, really Ruthanne, naughty,” Jake said, took a step to his wife and stopped her advance with a hand on her arm.

“Naughty enough to be punished before we begin anything here.”

“Jake?”

“I’m flattered, really, but I can’t have you sprinting after me on business trips, interrupting meetings like a jealous wife.” Jake said turning his pretty wife in her heels. ”Before we get to the obvious reason you’ve come,” the big man continued and began to help Ruthanne bend over the edge of the conference table. “…we need to make sure this doesn’t happen
again.”

Before Ruthanne could protest, react or even spread her legs sufficiently her husband’s usually gentle big hand SWAT her right ass cheek! God, she thought, her pussy flooding even more, Ruthanne really had missed Jake.

How to Have Marathon Sex

Tuesday, September 21st, 2010

A mind blowing orgasm each night is something that most of us only dream of while we’re busy being DJ Diddles. Could you possibly be the man whose name she screams again and again, all night long? If you don’t yet have the stamina of King Kong, or the skills of Gandalf the Great, you are in luck. Unfortunately, having sex all night is not as easy as showing up with a pile of lube and a rock solid cock from warming up to porn. So here are some tips!

Sexy Snacks

Sexy snacks does not include hiding a drumstick between your shoulder cleavage. Fantastic sex can burn a lot of calories, so more than likely you will need some energy to keep up an ambitious fuck marathon. Whipping cream, strawberries, bananas and pudding can all be a sexy light snack to give you another hour of power.

Make sure you feed each other as erotically as possible, and stay close to your sexy lady, too much distance can kill you chances of having sex immediately afterwards.

Saucy Shower

A hot shower can revitalize and refresh us at the worst of times. Cleanliness offers one benefit that you may not have considered – it creates less inhibition. You don’t want to wonder why it smells like a warm fish market as you make your way between her legs. Oral sex should always be an option during sex, and showering between multiple sex sessions can allow you to suck and fuck all night comfortably and cleanly.

Caress and massage your women, and make her feel relaxed. Don’t sit in the fetal position crying like usual, stand behind her, soap her up and wash her down.

Avoid Over Exertion

The secret to multiple sex sessions is to set a pace that you can keep up. Fast and furious might work when you have ten minutes of spare time before you go to work, however the aim is to last a while longer.

Slow and steady

If you want to cross the finish line in your sex marathon, you should practice these tips. The period after a sex session can be used as a refreshing break before you hit the sheets once more. A little bit of planning might make you a legend among the ladies, and one fit mother fucker.

The Kama Sutra Abridged: A Lazy Man’s Bible To Sex

Monday, September 20th, 2010

With all the performance pressure placed on men in North America it’s easy to get carried away during sex. The Reverse Spoon, The Lap-Dancing Cowgirl, The Butterfly Effect – after a while it feels like like you’re dodging bullets in The Matrix. Let’s face it, the average man is no Keanu Reeves – hell most of you reading this aren’t even a poor-man’s Mickey Rourke. So listen up: here are a few of the lazy man’s essential sexual positions (ie. positions you don’t have to be a porn star to pull off).

The Nocturnal Emission: Also known as a wet dream, The Nocturnal Emission is the sexual scenario of choice for obese cowboys and rodeo clowns. Of course, it’s not limited to those demographics, however a quick cross section will reveal that most obese cowboys do in fact prefer The Nocturnal Emission over say, The Splitter.

The Failed Push-Up: This position is similar to the missionary position, only it involves less thrusting. After all, once you’ve failed at an initial push-up, why attempt another? Just let your penis rest in your lady’s bucket of luke warm juice and wiggle a little. It counts as fucking and helps preserve calories.

The Lazy Dog: Similar to doggy style, this position is also known as Hide the Bone. If you’re feeling like a dingo, but not quite as rabid, you might want to try this out by sitting on top of your sexy skank and sticking your cock in just for a howl. Woof!

Jarred from Subway’s Special Sauce Surprise: Naturally, we saved the best for last. The beauty of The JFSSSS is that it doesn’t require much participation – just beat off until you’re ready and deposit a load of salty semen on your consenting lady’s lips. Hell, if you’re lucky, she may not even wake up!

The 15 Minute Orgasm

Thursday, September 16th, 2010

Becoming the modern day superhero known to sexy ladies everywhere as Orgasmo doesn’t involve a life study in tantric sex. Young grasshopper, the Yoda of orgasms is here to teach you the art of the 15 minute orgasm. You can turn that quickie into a orgasm that will leave her twitching for two hours if you follow my advice.

Sexologists at the Kinsey Institute in the US found that average women can orgasm after 10-20 minutes of sex. Learning how to prep your sexy lady with some pre-gasm exercises will stimulate her vaginal nerves and have her pussy warmed up for performance.

After you take her to a comedy show, or wait till she’s done her yoga class, have a few drinks of wine at your flat. Researchers at the University of Florence found that women who drink a glass or two of red wine are more aroused. Don’t worry if you cant warm her up with wine, as you can always try some free porn instead.

Now that she’s in the mood, it’s your turn to provide everything she needs.

15 Minute Mark

In the beginning of your 15 minute orgasm teachings, you will need to utilize the simplest of moves. Invest at least 3 minutes to kissing – it has been found to reduce levels of stress and turns a women on faster then a Brad Pitt autograph. German scientists found that kissing develops a connection chemical between the two of you called oxytocin. It will build trust and encourage lady to cum quickly, and often! Be sure you kiss more than her mouth. Pay attention to her neck and ears, while undressing her slowly.

12 Minute Mark

Your girl is nearly naked now, but keep her underwear on for another minute or so. “Stroke and caress her through the fabric rather than going for gold,” says sex therapist Paula Hall. “Focus on building anticipation rather than going straight for direct stimulation. If you make it seem like you’re in for a quickie she is less likely to orgasm as quickly. Women love a man who is good with his hands.

10 Minute Mark

Orgasms aren’t always about foreplay, however if you’re going to skip the foreplay, be prepared for a fickle fuck. Providing some warm up till this point is important in setting the stage for her explosive orgasm. Clocking in at around 7 minutes of solid penetration is the ideal time to push things to the next level.

7 Minute Mark

Inexperience men at this point will probably be asking themselves “next level?! isn’t is this where I unload on her stomach and say good night?” Any wise lover would know that this is where you bust out the power positions. Try bracing your feet at the foot of the bed, and rocking back and forward rather then thrusting. Stimulating her clit with your shaft while penetrating her g-spot is a move that will require some practice young padowan.

! Minute Mark

At this point, your lady should be clawing at the sheets and clinching for the final orgasm. Don’t try anything new at this point, since changing your rhythm will likely bring her down a few steps. Keep your pace and penetration the same until she is left convulsing in orgasmic splendor. If you are a real Jedi, you will be able to pull out and bust load all over those big beautiful tits of hers.

New Google Feature Censoring Adult Content

Sunday, September 12th, 2010

“With great power comes great responsibility.” The wise words of Uncle Ben ring true for the super power that is Google. Google is a powerful tool that can be used for great things. Google instant search gives you real time results as you type – predicting your queries. Unless your searching for sex related things that is.

Earlier today, google launched instant search to the US, with an international release coming later next week. The search shifts will deliver results while you type, no kicking or hitting enter will be required. Simply typing the letter w will bring up weather forecasts, or the search you’re most likely seeking.

However, those of you sex searching all day wont be able to type in “tits” for example. Only a empty blank page will greet you, not the joy of our Dickipedia entry on “tits”. It doesn’t matter if your safe search is disabled, the instant results simply censor out naughty content.

When Google was asked about this feature earlier today at a question session, the director of product management said the friendly feature is being used to protect children. Limiting offensive content will allow the majority of users receive information that wont be diluted with sexual content.

It’s a smart feature for the site and will likely keep seven year olds interested in the pussy cat dolls out of trouble. Those of us who are adamant on finding free porn will still be able to do so with extreme ease, so don’t get your panties up in a knot. The decision to exclude naughty words might eventuality be remedied with another censor feature, for now though us pervs will have to continue to hit the old reliable enter key before going on our porn hunt.

Winona County Declares War On Porn

Saturday, September 11th, 2010

Middle America is known for its right wing political agendas and overly keen interest in private citizen’s bedrooms. In Winona County, Minnesota, county commissioners have taken their meddling to a new level, announcing a “clean hotel” policy that forbids county employees from staying in hotel rooms that offer pornographic movies. While Winona County only employs 334 people, this latest ban goes beyond the small community and violates the civil rights of its employees.

By attempting to control what their employees consume in their private lives by banning porn in hotel rooms, Winona County is opening up an old debate. Unfortunately, they aren’t sticking to the rules either, claiming that porn leads to sexual assaults despite evidence to the contrary. Pornography, a medium enjoyed by nearly every citizen in America, has never been linked to negative activities in viewers. In fact, many studies show that porn enhances the sex lives of its viewers, and many types of porn are used therapeutically in patients with erectile dysfunction.

This is simply another instance of political propaganda taken too far. Thank God for the internet, where free porn is prevalent and the citizens of America won’t be persecuted for enjoying a goof fuck or fisting to help them relax after work. Hell, the citizens of Winona County are clearly in need of online porn to cheer them up in light of this latest ban. Let’s hope they bring their laptops to hotel rooms around the country so they can enjoy top quality adult entertainment on sites like orgasm.com.

How to do Nude Beaches

Friday, September 10th, 2010

Around the world you can find nude beaches full of people whom let their freedom flag fly. A naturist is a name given to someone with a penchant for social nudity, however you may not be quite the naturist yet.

A chance to stay beachside near a clothing optional B&B can reveal some of the joys of letting go of your inhibitions. Here you’ll find some of the top tips for letting it all hang out at nudist beaches. It’s the most fun you’ll have with your clothes off besides sex.

If you want to be a bit closer to nature, or simply get rid of those tan lines you’ve got to swap the bathing suit for your birthday suit. Drop your trousers and let your wang hang. So you know for future reference, the flaunt it rule does not always apply in all cases. If you get a hard on for some nice tits beside you, its generally unacceptable to show off your new found friend woody.

You will need some confidence for this thing if you are a little skeptical of rampant exhibitionism. It may feel wild and liberated, however nudist beaches are not the best place to practice pole dancing or yoga poses. Unless you truly enjoy showing off those giant tits, or perhaps that giant cock.

If you’re lucky enough, you might find yourself sitting beside some fine young hunnies, however this is not an open invitation to hop on her right on the beach. Sex isn’t uncommon on a nudist beach, however a free porn show is not generally accepted by the large portion of people there. Just because you’re half way there, doesn’t mean you should take advantage of the situation. There is always the ocean.

Before you start to wander off the beach, pay attention to the people around you, not the entire beach may be nudist. You don’t want to end up having an awkward confrontation with beach patrol in a clothing area of the beach.

If you’ve gone so far to go nude at the beach, you’re likely feeling liberated and one with the world. If you find yourself stripping naked when the sun shines through the office window, it’s probably time you pack up and move to a commune.

Porn as Therapy?

Thursday, September 9th, 2010

When pornography is discussed in a mainstream context, it’s normally villainized by right-wing politicians who use it to serve anti-sex agendas. While this might not seem fair, the general public is becoming more open minded and some are even incorporating lessons learned from porn into their everyday lives. So let’s forget the negative press devoted to porn, and look at what porn can do for you!

1. Therapy: Talk to any sexologist and they’ll tell you that porn is a valuable therapeutic tool. For whom you may ask? The answer is varied, but mainly the impotent. After all, who wouldn’t get aroused by a chick having double penetration in the back of a bus, or a fake titted whore taking bukkake from about 10 guys? Even those who have a hard time getting it up would agree that these are stiffening scenarios.

2. Education: Sure, teenagers could wait for their parents to sit them down and have an awkward conversation about sex with them that would ultimately just end in more uncomfort. This is where free porn comes in. The internet is full of porn that can be used as an educational tool for sexually inexperienced teenagers of legal age. We live in a visual culture, and there’s no better way to learn how to fuck than to watch a couple of hotties in action.

3. Acceptance: Porn films often portray actors from a variety of different racial backgrounds, and are inspirational in their inclusiveness. Before you criticize, consider the implications of 2 guys fucking a girl at the same time. To do this, one has to be comfortable with his sexuality, and reject the homophobic consensus that rules North America.

There’s much to be learned from porn, so don’t close off your mind, and certainly don’t close your eyes. You wouldn’t want to miss a moment of the action!