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IUD


An IUD is an Intrauterine Device. It is a kind of birth control in which an object is inserted into the uterus to stop impregnation. It is the best kind of birth control for monogamous couples, in my opinion, because certain kinds of IUDs don’t have hormonal elements to them, which makes them better than the birth control pill. And they’re better than condoms, because they allow the man to feel his lady’s vagina without having a bag over his cock.

Boom. Case closed.

There are two popular kinds of IUDs that a woman can use. The first is one made of a copper core, and the other is made with hormones. Like I said earlier, I would advise that women use the copper ones, because adding more hormones into a woman is like adding more crazy to a lunatic pie. You don’t need them. Granted, there are advantages to the hormone IUD, namely that your menstruation bleeding is greatly reduced or even eliminated altogether. So, if you want more crazy in exchange for less bleeding, I guess you can go that way.

A monogamous girlfriend I was involved with a few years back decided to look into getting an IUD for herself. She hated the way that the birth control pill made her emotional stability frantic (to say the least), and we both hated the way condoms felt during sex. It’s so much better when sex is skin-to-skin. So, we started looking at other birth control possibilities. I researched getting myself a vasectomy, and she did some homework on getting an IUD.

She told me that when she talked with her doctor about it, he said that he normally didn’t give a prescription to get an IUD (which you need) to unmarried women under 35. He said that too many women were getting an IUD and then changing their minds about it later. Once a married woman hits 35, she can be trusted to know whether or not she wants to have children, I guess. We decided to go with the vasectomy, and I’ve been shooting blanks ever since.

We ended up ending the relationship after one particularly intense LSD experience together, during which she and I went to a local petting zoo and she made out with a llama for two hours. She tried to convince me that it was the drugs, and that she thought it was me she was kissing the whole time, but I knew the truth. She always had a thing for South American farm animals. Last I heard, she was living in Peru and was very happy.

An IUD is a great alternative for monogamous couples. With a failure rate of less than 2%, it can be the best option for you!

1. Women who have a lot of unprotected sex with strange men should get themselves an IUD and use it in combination with condoms.

2. Pete always worried that his wife’s IUD was going to stab the tip of his dick when he went balls deep.

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