Posts Tagged ‘Sex’

Transform Your Pad Into A Love Nest

Monday, November 22nd, 2010

If you sex life leaves much to be desired and you’re now resorting to free porn, consider your surroundings. Chances are, your apartment is about as inviting and your grandomother’s – and that’s so not sexy. A home that sets the mood for romance and intimacy can often be one of the best way to get your sex life back in working order. Below, we highlight a few tips that will get your pad from looking like a frat house, to a full-fledged love nest.

Nov. 19 - Transform Your Pad Into A Love Nest

1. Focus On The Energy – Aim towards creating a ‘love corner’ in every major room in your house. In order to create an intimate environment, avoid placing any computers, exersize equipment or books in that spot. Those tend to encourage solitary actions and won’t get you in the mood for play. Instead, place two matching objects in full display (candles or matching art pieces), which will indicate that your designated corner is a place for love.

2. Work With Your Partner - When setting up your love nest, be sure to make it a reflection of not only you, but your partner as well. Focusing too much on your likes while ignoring your significant-other’s point of view won’t make them any more inclined to getting down and dirty. And remember, a clean and tidy environment is always more welcome that a messy room. The later is nothing short of a turn off.

3. Use Sex As Your Inspiration – When decorating for love-making purposes, it’s crucial to have sex on the mind. Think sexy, lusting thoughts and consider chaise lounge chairs, luscious fabrics (silk, cashmere etc.) and of course, leather. A nice, modern shag rug is also a great option for those who are bored of the bedroom.

4. Lighting Is Everything – One of the best ways to set the mood is through appropriate lighting. Place emphasis on inviting spots such as a couch or lounge chair and be sure to keep it dim. Bright lights don’t necessarily scream “do me now”. Instead, focus on candles, lamps and wall lighting. Orgasms will be sure to follow.

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Seriously Odd Sex Stuff

Monday, November 22nd, 2010

No sex advice or porn tips here. Today, I’m going to give you a little something purely for your entertainment; a look at some seriously odd sex stuff found all around the world.

Sarah Carmen from the UK has about 200 orgasm a day from anything that vibrates. She has a rare disorder called Permanent Sexual Arousal Syndrome, which causes a lot more blood than normal to flow to the genitals, which has resulted in spontaneous and constant arousal. She’s sitting on the bus going down a rocky road: orgasm.

A belgian optician was arrested in 1995 for making his chick patients strip down naked and dance to accordion music before he gave them their check up.

In 1993 a man names Karl Watkins from England was given 18 months in prison for having sex with the pavement. Two years later he was put on three years probation for stimulating sex in public with a bin liner.

A grenade, a teacup, a pair of glasses and a frozen pig’s tail are all objects that have been removed by doctors from different men’s asses.

In 1993 a service was started in Japan that allowed customers to buy the used panties of school girls, housewives, nurses and widows.

I bet you don’t know what an autopederast is. Let me explain; this is when a man can insert his own dick into his ass with a semi-erect penis. Of course it’s impossible for most men, but some lucky lads can perform this party trick.

In 1992 a man from the US was arrested for shooting himself with a bullet proof vest on for sexual kicks.

A man from New York injected cocaine into his penis. The result: he got gangrene. He had his legs above the knee amputated and all but one finger. His dick ended up falling off by itself while he was in the bath.

Adolf Frederick, the King of Sweden from 1751-1771 had seven mistresses: two only had one arm, two had one leg, and three only had one eye. He’s thought to have a sex fetish with amputees called acrotomophilia.

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After School

Sunday, November 21st, 2010

At exactly 3:45pm Tommy entered Miss Parsons’ classroom where he found his petite teacher busily correcting some papers…one of which he knew was his less then stellar one from the day. The lady had her head down and didn’t realize the tall boy had entered until Tommy cleared his throat, startling her a little.

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“Oh good Tommy, good,” the smiling lady said looking up. “Come in, sit sit,” she said standing and walking to her classroom door to close it behind her thin high rump.

“Let’s see if we might address what’s been distracting you this week.”

“I uh, well, I don’t know exactly where to, I mean…”

“How am I going to help you if you don’t tell me what your problem is,” the teacher said taking a seat across from her student and leaning in to pat his hand. “I didn’t ask you to stay after school as a detention, I really would like to know what’s got you so, well, so not you this past week.”

“Well,” Tommy stammered, looking down. “You know, well, girl trouble I guess.”

“You’re dating Cheryl Raints, right? Lovely girl, very bright,” Miss Parsons said and Tommy finally looked up.

“Well, yeah, Cheryl, right.”

“Is this an intimate problem Tommy?”

Once again Tommy looked to his sneakers.

“Tommy,” his teacher said and he looked up again at that slightly scolding tone he had grown to know so well. “Please, there is nothing new under the sun here. I have been teaching a long time you know.”

“You know,” Tommy tried, “she doesn’t want to, well she does but she’s…”

“Cheryl thinks she’s too young, and isn’t ready for sex?”

“Uh, no, not exactly. She wants to all right, but well, she thinks I’m too big.”

Miss Parsons smiled at the embarrassed boy and sat back.

“Well Tommy, young girls, even the most popular young girls, are inexperienced.”

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“She says I’m a freak, Miss Parsons,” Tommy suddenly blurted. “I am coming to thing no girls is ever gonna let me…” “Nonsense young man, I’m quite sure that you are a normal young man who is letting the ravings of an inexperienced young girl get the better of him,” his teacher countered.
Tommy simply looked down again.

“Tommy,” Miss Parsons said standing then. “I’m going to prove to you that Cheryl is simply inexperienced, that you are perfectly normal, not a freak as she says.”

“Stand up and show me your penis,” she said.

Tommy turned six shades of red and started to wiggle, but Miss Parsons quickly cut him off. ”Tommy please, now?” Miss Parsons said reached over and tapped his wrist as she did to all her students when she wanted to get their attention.

Tommy stood slowly fixing his teacher with his gaze.

“Let’s get this over with so you can go home, and I can go back to correcting my papers.” Like a zombie Tommy moved, unbuckling his pants, unzipping his fly. Miss Parsons stood still the entire time, her thin lips set, her little green eyes staring at his. Finally reaching into his already tenting briefs, Tommy pulled his thick cock free and it began to grow in his hand as his teacher finally, slowly, inquisitively looked down.

The short teacher actually began to tap her foot as she assessed the hardening cock before her…but the tapping soon stopped.

“Um…well,” Tommy’s teacher said getting a real good look.

Tommy was right, his cock was huge!

“See, too big right?” Tommy said manipulating his log to fullness.

“Well, to tell you the truth,” Miss Parsons said, feeling her pussy flood and a blush come to her face.

“You do have a beautiful penis,” she sighed continuing. “Yes, it is rather large, but most women would adore having their vaginas filled with such a huge erection.”

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“Miss Parsons’ you’re just saying that to make me feel better. No one wants me, or ever will.” ”Oh, Tommy, you’re so wrong,” his teacher said and sat back on her chair. “Look.”

With this the lady lifted her short skirt, rolled her pantyhose down, and pulled her panty low to show Tommy her hairy cunt. Spreading her thick thighs wide, Miss Parson’s scooted to the edge of the low wooden chair and ran a finger between her fat lips.

“See how wet I am?” she said as Tommy stood there, one hand on his raging hard-on, rocking up on his toes as he looked down at his English teacher exposing herself to him.

“Get down here and see,” the lady added and Tommy did just that, knelt in front of his teacher.

The smell of the lady’s pussy, the fact that he was so close to a pussy and a pretty, wet one at that, made the boy swoon.

“You should taste it and see,” Miss Parsons said Tommy lean in and did just that. His mouth on Miss Parson’s hairy snatch he stuck his tongue through her fur and licked her thick sweet lips.
“Now tomorrow after class you can fuck me with that, Miss Parsons instructed. “But for now…”

Tommy knew the promise of more of this woman’s pussy would certainly keep him paying attention as she pushed his face even deeper into his teacher’s hot vagina.

What Makes Women Want To Have Sex

Friday, November 19th, 2010

Back when you were an innocent child and had just come across the concept of sex, you were probably inclined to believe that your parents only bumped uglies a handful of times – to conceive you and the rest of your siblings. However, as you got older you quickly realized that reproduction was often the last thing in the minds of sexually active folk. In fact, a new study shows that procreating is only one out of 237 reasons as to why people have sex. Below, we cover some of the most common reasons as to why women chose to get psychical.

1. You Know How To Kiss Her – Even if you’re no longer in high-school, you can never be too old for a good ol’ makeout session. In fact, women are far less likely to have sex with a bad kisser. Now, before deeming yourself lucky and heading out to look for a one-night-stand, know that your definition of a good kiss may not be the same as your partners. To increase your chances, make sure you act with confidence, smell good and most importantly, brush you teeth.

2. You’re Willing To Commit – Nothing can turn a woman off more than lack of commitment. If you’ve wined her and dined her and have yet to have to get laid, she’s probably still second-guessing your ability to commit. So if you want to ‘get down tonight’, let her know just how involved you really are.

3. You Know How To Pick The Right Spot – Knowing how to use romance in the right ways can be one of the most beneficial aspects for those wanting to get lucky. Start by picking out the perfect location. Traveling to a foreign country will bring a sense of excitement that she may not have back home. By sharing a foreign experience as a couple, your sense of intimacy will be far greater, thus increasing your chances of jumping her bones.

4. You Look Good – Meatheads can work out all they want, but they’re not necessarily attracting women in the process. A recent UCLA study determined that women found lean, toned bodies a lot more desirable than their skinny or bulky counterparts. Women perceive too much muscle as being somewhat of a threat and are well aware that it comes at a price. After all, it takes plenty of time to get that big – and it’s time you could’ve been spending with her.

5. She Wants To Cater To Your Needs – For those seeking an orgasm, start with communication. Woman can often feel insecure about initiating sex due to lack of information as to your likes and dislikes in the sack. To fix this, try to have an open conversation about your sexual preferences – preferably outside the bedroom. Studies show that 79% of unpleasant sex-related chats happen right before – or after – sex. An alternative for the brave: have her watch some free porn and pay attention to her remarks. You may learn a lot more than you think.

Nov. 18 - What Makes Women Want To Have Sex

The Spermjacker: Coming To A Bar Near You

Wednesday, November 17th, 2010

imagesAs kids, our parents would go on and on about the alleged bogeyman, an evil man who would snatch us away if we were too naughty. What they never told us however, was about Lara Carter, the dreaded spermjacker. When all the children have gone to bed, Carter heads out deep into the night. Her mission? To have unprotected sex with innocent victims.

The story goes as follows: After witnessing one of her friends holding her newborn baby, Lara Carter found herself with the uncontrollable urge to have kids of her own. Having no boyfriend or potential prospects, and discarding the possibility of resorting to a sperm-bank (due to its high cost), Carter realized that all she really needed was some sperm. And damnit, she was going to get it.

The process was really quite simple. After taking an ovulation test and determining her chances of fertility, Lara would go to bars and throw herself at men while pretending to be drunk. Unlikely to turn down an easy lay, men would have sex with her while being completely unaware of her true intentions. In the event of a one-night-stand wanting to use protection, Carter would make sure to carry condom in her purse. One small detail, however – the tips were all cut off.

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Although Lara has yet to be sperminated, she openly talks about her pursuit and even labels herself “the sperm hunter”. According to the woman herself, “Men my age aren’t interested in a relationship, so I have given up on trying to have a relationship with a parter”. It is still unclear as to how Carter will react to her ‘babydaddy’ – aka. could you ask for child support after technically stealing sperm? But as a reminder to men everywhere, stay away from women who are a little too eager for a one-night-stand. You don’t want to end up with a bastard child. And If you’re feeling horny, free porn is a far safer bet.

“SexyTime” on the iPhone

Wednesday, November 17th, 2010

Once again there has been a link to Apple and sex. First it was the direct connection of iPhone owners and how they are more likely to have more sex partners than regular Blackberry or android users. Then it was watching porn instantaneously on the iPad or the iPhone. And now its a new, premium sex application for both the iPad and the iPhone.

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Except that this application is not just another attempt to monetize sexual curiosity, there is actually some scientific backing to it. Even though the “SexyTime Sex Position Guide and Choreographer” has already been banned in China after just one month of being on the market. Apparently not everyone appreciates the science of sex!

The company’s platform is nothing but a simple yet ambitious statement: to improve health and wellness through better sex. One of the chief scientists working on the application said that is easier said than done. Apparently people are attracted to over-the-top, flashy products, and something that is geared towards improving health is not as enticing.

It’s pretty sad that people, especially those who really need the advice, aren’t taking advantage of this application because it is the one’s who need the advice most that are less likely to go out and see it! And what better way to get it right on your iPhone.

I always thought my dick was the most important sex organ, but according to these scientists, the brain is. Who would have thought? That’s the main reason for creating this application, so that “people enjoy exciting, rewarding lovemaking, and simultaneously become smarter about sex. Better, more frequent sex means healthier minds and bodies.”

Sounds kind of lame to me, except for the fact that the app also will help in suggesting new ideas and techniques to your partner in the bedroom. Something I’m sure we all need a a little help in!

The app is completely inexpensive, especially compared to the benefits. Something that gives sex advice anywhere on the go has got to be worth something!

Mid-Fuck Fuck-Ups

Monday, November 15th, 2010

It’s happened to just about everybody. You’re in the middle of a heavy makeout session when all-of-a-sudden, that chili you ate for dinner decides to manifest itself though an embarrassing fart. Or perhaps you foolishly scream out the name of your ex without realizing it. Whatever your sex stumble, know that we’ve all experienced one or two throughout our lives. Below, we look at some of the most common sex bummers as well as tips on how to save face once they happen.

1. Bringing Up Your Ex In Sex – If you suffer from a sudden brain fart and end up calling out your ex fling’s name mid-sex, there is very little you can do to salvage the situation. Not only will your partner be extremely upset (understandably so), but it will also make them wonder if you have any leftover feelings for your former lover. The best you can do at this point, is deny, deny, deny. Only time can heal a lack of trust. And sometimes, not even that.

2. Peeing By Accident – Sometimes, constant pressure applied to a woman’s stomach can be enough to make her pee by accident. To avoid going through such humiliation, make sure to relive yourself before jumping into sex. Not having to preoccupy yourself with the need to tinkle will make for a much more pleasurable experience.

3. Flatulence – Much like peeing in the middle of sex, farting can also be just as distracting – and gross. In order to avoid dealing with gastritis, cut off potatoes, peas and baked goods off your diet before a night of passion. Exercising, or going for a brisk walk before getting down an dirty will also help you digest and avoid any future embarrassments.

4. Long Nails – Although movies tend to depict it as something erotic, there is nothing sexy about having scratches all of over your back. Not only would it be incredibly painful but long nails tend to be associated to a lack of hygiene. As for long toe nails, don’t even get me started. Keep yourself in check by making sure your talons are properly filed and have no traces of dirt. Failure to do so could result in you watching free porn instead of getting laid.

Nov. 12 - Mid-Fuck Fuck-Ups

5. Falling Asleep – Once in awhile, even the promise of an orgasm is not enough to keep you awake. To avoid falling asleep mid-sex and embarrassing yourself and your partner, either skip it all together or take a quick shower climbing into bed. The water will help to wake you up, at least for a short while.

Wind Blowing The Sail On Your Mast: Putting The Fun Back Into Masturbation

Sunday, November 14th, 2010

Masturbation is the most common sexual activity in the world – even men with girlfriends and wives often masturbate more often than they have straight up sex. Despite this fact, masturbation is rarely discussed, and has become a neglected part of a healthy sex life. Knowing how to take care of yourself is crucial, so we’ve come up with some solutions to make your masturbatory routine a more varied and tactile experience.

#1 The Fleshlight: While the fleshlight is the most costly suggestion on our list, it’s also the most rewarding. Shaped like a flashlight, the fleshlight is made of plastic that feels nearly like human skin. No word of a lie, sticking your cock in the vaginal opening for a quick fuck is magic. If you have the resources, we recommend the fleshlight for a reality based experience.

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#2 Apple Pie: American Pie popularized the hot apple pie technique years ago, however it’s now seen as a masturbation cliche. There’s no reason for this, as pie a perfectly viable way to get your rocks off (did I mention it was warm too?). Just remember to pull out before you bust a nut though, you wouldn’t want to add any special sauce to Sunday night’s desert.

#3 The Mattress Technique: This is the real reason box-springs were invented: just slip your cock between your mattress and box-spring and start fucking – and you’ll see what we mean. Pure bliss!

#4 A Bag of Vaseline: If you’re not a fan of the mattress technique above, it’s probably because you don’t like your masturbation quite as rough as we do. For those who aren’t satisfied with a rough ride, we recommend the good ol’ baggy of vaseline. It’s smooth, silky and sensual without too much mess (as long as you pick an appropriate bag).

#5 The Old Standard: With all of our tried and true methods, don’t forget that sometimes it’s great to masturbate with a clenched fist. It’s God’s way – so pump your penis hard with this old school technique on Sundays! Over and out.

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The Urge

Friday, November 12th, 2010

“Oh, no,” Belinda groaned to herself. “Not now, please not now.”

No amount of self-pleading or denial would change the basic fact; Belinda was a lesbian who felt this uncontrollable urge boil up in her once every three months or so. The willowy blonde with the big brown eyes never knew exactly when she’s start ruminating over this particular fantasy, but when Belinda got it in her mind to be taken by a bull dyke, and taken hard, her frilly panties would drench-like they were then-she’d sweat through each torturously slow tick of the clock on her office wall and she’d bounce her little bottom on her deep leather chair thinking of nothing else except how much she wanted her aching pussy lips to be spread and her vagina pummeled hard by a thick deep dildo-ing.

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Five fifteen couldn’t come fast enough for Belinda.

As usual this particular bar was so dark that it took Belinda a few seconds for her eyes to adjust. She wished she didn’t have to come here, but the “Cat and Chew” was really the only place in town where she could answer her particular submissive urge. The nicer upscale lezzy bars across town were nice meeting places and occasionally you’d catch girls engaged in a little under the table pussy tickling, but all the girls knew the C&C was the place for the down and dirty stuff.
And as the pretty girl sipped her Jack and diet Coke, she knew that her need, her throbbing deep pussy ache, her poking nipple burn would send her even further, to that single door marked “Gals” at the back of the room.

Belinda finished her drink in one final gulp; walked past a group of woman dressed professionally like her then pushed open the bathroom door.

The light hurt her eyes after walking through such a dark bar but Belinda adjusted quickly enough to spy the scene she was all too familiar with, one that both revolted and excited her. A pretty young fem, maybe only a few years younger then Belinda’s thirty years, was up on the bathroom sink, her longs legs spread, her back against the wall while a broad-shouldered, big ass bull dyke stood up on her, a leather harness round her wide self, fucking the little girl so hard the mirror behind her was shaking. From her angle, Belinda could just about see the thick black dildo pumping the little girl’s spread flooding cunt.

“Paa…please,” the little girl brayed, evidently being rent open, but of course her fucker made no move to slow her pace; very much as Belinda wouldn’t have wanted her to.

The other occupants in the room were a leather clad dyke sprawled in a large stuffed chair with her legs spread and a cute little black girl on her knees before her, lapping at the bigger girls swollen, exposed red pussy. The aroma of female sex filled the room, a heady mix with the scene Belinda was witnessing and her own undulating urges.

The big dyke fucking the girl on the sink turned to the momentarily rocked Belinda.

“Been a while, huh?” the large lady said not stopping her stride. “Come for another good fuckin’ from Bobbi?”

Belinda was too overcome with fear and lust to answer immediately.

“Good keep quiet,” Bobbi continued and thrust real deep into the suffering pussy before her. The blonde whimpered and shook.

“The less you say the more I wanted to hurt you.”

“I’m done here,” Bobbi said a minute later, pulled back and the huge dildo slid and “popped” out of the drenched pussy it had been filling. The girl on the counter-top simply rolled away, knelt to the cold tile floor and huddled under the sink full fetal.

Ripping the condom off the huge sex toy Bobbi turned to Belinda fully then.

“Kiss me,” she said.

With her head bowed Belinda made her way over to Bobbi who immediately forced her mouth open and stuck her tongue deep into the shaking fem’s throat. As always the big bull dyke tasted of cigarettes and bourbon, instantly causing Belinda’s knees to go weak as she realized she was yet again succumbing to her most base desires here at the C&C.

“Face the sink,” Bobbi said breaking from the kiss.

Belinda walked to the wall, rested her forehead to the cool mirror, spread her legs and lifted her modest work dress. Having removed her panties at lunch time, she quickly showed her fine ass to Bobbi-and whomever else happened to walk in the bathroom-arched her back and presented her silky little pussy lips from behind for the big lady to take.

Through the mirror Belinda could see Bobbie fitting a new condom on that huge thick fake cock.

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The History of the Sex Doll

Friday, November 12th, 2010

Nov 11 orgasm.com1Before the advent of free porn online, guys all over the world had to resort to lonely old masturbation as a source of relieving their sexual tensions. They couldn’t bring up something erotic in the privacy of their own homes within 20 seconds and a lot of times the regular “choking the chicken” approach just didn’t do it for them. Therefore, the sex doll was created.

If you’ve been living in a cave for the past twenty years and haven’t heard of a sex doll, it’s basically a sex toy that is used for sexual relief. It’s an inmate object that is crafted and designed by some of the top engineers in the world to replicate the female genitalia. Creating a sex doll requires an intricate process and some of them even offer an array of designs that have been influenced by the complete female body.

The origins of the high and mighty sex doll was actually created when antsy sailors set out on a long voyage with no hopes of female interaction for months at a time. They created a female doll sewn out of cloth, brought it on board and passed it around from sailor to sailor.

In later years, some very smart men took this idea and ran with it only to create commercialized versions of the doll that were in the form of blow up dolls, body sections and the infamous real doll.

Blow Up Dolls: are the inflatable sex toy made to look like a woman’s body. Usually consisting of three entry points; mouth, vagina, and ass.

Body Sections: are made from some pretty amazing material and are manufactured to look like certain sections of the body.

Real Dolls: are insanely crafted and are usually the full body of a woman. They’re pretty pricey but made from silicone and has all the lifelike details of a living woman’s body minus the “life” part. They even come with metal skeletons and flexible joints to position the dolls in whatever position you like. The downside; if you are experiencing problems you more than likely will have to ship her away to be repaired, which probably means no sex for you.

The only advice I have if you’re somewhat interested in a Real Doll is to be careful. Some men take their relationship to another level and become totally intertwined with their doll and end up acting like they’re a real person. The people end up going crazy and you don’t want to be one of those!

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