The Kama Sutra is what people read before there was the Internet. With useful chapters about getting to first-base such as “On Kissing,” to chapters detailing what you can do with your wife once you’ve rounded home-base enough times that it has started to get boring “On Biting, and the ways of Love to be employed with regard to Women of different countries.” If you’re so bored that you’ve started to consider playing a different sport altogether, there’s a chapter called “About females acting the part of Males.” This is also the place to discover some new moves to try out, though BEWARE, you might realize that your favourite sex position is older than your grandma’s grandma’s grandma, which would be a huge turn-off.
There are a lot of boring sections about how to acquire a wife and how to treat her right blah blah blah. The answers to most of these questions can be found by Googling but if for some reason we revert back to the Dark Ages, we’ll still have the Kama Sutra to tell us “The reason why Women reject the Addresses of Men. About Men who have Success with Women, and about Women who are easily gained over.” Undeniable proof that nothing ever changes.
1. My son is useless with women. I’m afraid he will never get laid. I think I will leave a copy of the Kama Sutra by his bed.
2. Honey, perhaps we can save our marriage by staying in tonight and reading the Kama Sutra together?
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