Orgasm News spoke to Dr. Jess O’Reilly aka Dr. Jess, a popular Toronto-based sexologist. She spoke about how she became a sexual health counselor as well as her new book Hot Sex Tips, Tricks and Licks coming out in 2013.

 

Orgasm News: Can you tell us about becoming a sexual health counselor? What did it entail?

Dr. Jessica O’Reilly: I did an undergraduate degree in Sexual Diversity Studies and started working at the University of Toronto’s peer counseling centre in my first year of school. Eventually, I completed a PhD in sexual health education, so it was a long process, but well worth it!

 

Orgasm News: What do you find fascinating about helping people in relation to their sexual health and sexual well being?

Dr. Jess: The most appealing element of my work relates to working with youth. Young people are brilliant and inquisitive and we have a bad habit of concealing accurate information from them with regard to sex. This is why working to improve classroom-based sexual health education is my top priority.

 

Orgasm News: What are some of the most popular questions you get asked about sex?

Dr. Jess: Any version of “Am I normal if…?” The answer is “Yes!”.

 

Orgasm News: You have a new book coming out in 2013: Hot Sex Tips, Tricks and Licks. Can you tell us a little about it?

Dr. Jess: I sure can! Hot Sex Tips, Tricks and Licks is a technique-based book for men, women, singles and couples that focuses on oral sex from a fresh perspective. I don’t have all the answers and I don’t claim to have the perfect technique, but I do have a VERY broad repertoire that should inspire you to try new things. It’s available on Amazon: http://www.amazon.com/Hot-Sex-Tips-Tricks-Licks/dp/1592335357

 

Orgasm News: there any interesting books or articles in regards to sex or relationships you have recently read? Can you share it with our audience?

Dr. Jess: I love Esther Perel’s Mating in Captivity. It is a great read for professionals and clients alike.

 

Orgasm News: You speak at many conferences that deal with sexual health and sexuality around the globe. What are your favourite subjects to talk about? Why?

Dr. Jess: I love talking about healthy relationships and what they might entail. From managing jealousy to sharing fantasies, I see my speaking engagements as an opportunity to help clients open new conversations and push their boundaries with regard to sexual communication.

 

Orgasm News: What are your thoughts on porn? Do you use it as a tool when you help individuals and couples in your practice?

Dr. Jess: Sometimes I’ll suggest that couples look at erotic films, but I remind them that mainstream porn is not educational — it is for entertainment and titillation purposes only, so you cannot expect your sexual experiences to look like the actors’.

 

Orgasm News: You do workshops on many topics including ‘All About the Female Orgasm.’ What is the best way for a woman to get one? Do you find many women out there never experiencing one? Why?

Dr. Jess: I work with lots of women who have never experienced an orgasm and there are many approaches to learning. We begin with some basic anatomy education, personal exploration, examination of sexual attitudes and inhibitions and self-pleasure. Eventually, they may experiment with vibrators, running water, toys, fantasy, erotic stories and/or erotic videos. Most women do not orgasm from penetration alone, so learning to rub, grind and create friction on the outside is often as important as learning to be present and relish in the sensations without distraction or shame.

 

Orgasm News: When pleasuring a woman orally, what are some tips to do have for men out there?

Dr. Jess: Start slowly and gently gradually increasing your speed and intensity. Parts of the clitoris (including its legs) under the labia, so stroke around the outside before even considering penetration. And don’t treat her clitoris like an elevator button! That little pea-sized bump is only the beginning, so pay attention to her entire vulva using your lips, tongue and fingers. Try pressing your entire palm over her vulva and letting her rock, press and rub against it to indicate just how much pressure and speed she craves. I wrote a 3-part feature on How to Touch A Woman earlier this year for Eligible Magazine.

 

Orgasm News: Along with your book, are there any other projects you are currently working on?

Dr. Jess: I’m releasing two more projects next fall: a deck of cards full of oral sex tips and a how-to kink manual for those inspired by 50 Shades of Grey.

 

I’ll also be going on tour next year with stops in Miami, Toronto, Montreal, Calgary, Las Vegas, Los Angeles, Jamaica (Negril) and Mexico (Puerto Morelos). I anticipate filming another season of PlayboyTV’s SWING and will be producing some instructional videos available for download next Spring.

 

Followers can get daily updates, pictures and videos on my Facebook and Twitter pages.

 

Orgasm News:  Thanks for taking the time to talk with us Dr. Jess!